Kate Scholtes | Redefining Success & Alignment: Permission to Pivot in Motherhood + Business

When Success Stops Feeling Like Success

There is a quiet shift that happens in motherhood that no one really prepares you for. It’s not always dramatic. It doesn’t arrive with a loud announcement or a clear turning point. But one day, you wake up and realize that the things that once motivated you don’t carry the same weight anymore.

The goals still look impressive. The milestones still make sense on paper. The growth metrics still matter. And yet something internally has shifted. What once felt like ambition now feels like pressure. What once felt energizing now feels exhausting.

In this episode of The Mama Making Podcast, Kate Scholtes and I talk about that exact shift — the moment when motherhood reshapes not just your calendar or your sleep schedule, but your entire definition of success. And more importantly, what it looks like to give yourself permission to pivot when what once fit no longer does.

The First Pivot: Leaving the “Secure” Path

Kate’s journey began in a place many of us recognize: following the plan. She earned her master’s degree in education and stepped into the classroom with the assumption that this was the long-term path. Teaching was stable. It was respectable. It was aligned with everything she had worked toward.

And yet, within a couple of years, she felt the quiet discomfort of misalignment. She didn’t hate teaching. She wasn’t failing at it. But she couldn’t ignore the persistent question that kept surfacing: Is this really what I want to do forever?

That question led her into entrepreneurship through network marketing. It offered flexibility, income potential, and a different kind of autonomy. And by most measures, it worked. She built a successful business. She earned recognition. She gained financial freedom. She left the classroom behind.

From the outside, it looked like a win.

Then she became a mother.

When Motherhood Changes the Scoreboard

Motherhood has a way of rearranging priorities without asking permission. Kate described looking at her newborn son and feeling an overwhelming clarity: the things that once defined her no longer felt central.

The accolades didn’t land the same way. The hustle didn’t feel empowering anymore. The constant push for growth and visibility felt heavier than it once had.

It wasn’t that her business was failing. In fact, it was successful. Income was steady. Her family relied on it. But internally, something felt off. The version of success she had been chasing no longer aligned with the season she was in.

And this is where so many women get stuck.

Because when something is working financially, it’s hard to admit that it isn’t working emotionally. It’s hard to say out loud that you’ve outgrown something that once served you well.

But alignment isn’t about optics. It’s about internal resonance. And Kate knew she needed to pay attention to what she was feeling.

Alignment Is Ongoing Maintenance

One of the most powerful ideas from our conversation was Kate’s comparison of alignment to car maintenance. You don’t align your tires once and assume they’ll stay perfect forever. You check them. You recalibrate. You adjust when needed.

Motherhood guarantees change. Business seasons shift. Energy levels fluctuate. What aligned two years ago may not align now — and that doesn’t mean you made the wrong decision back then. It simply means you’re evolving.

This is a concept that often gets lost in the online business world, where messaging suggests that once you “find your thing,” you stick with it indefinitely. But real life doesn’t work that way. Kids grow. Family needs change. Capacity expands and contracts.

Alignment isn’t a destination. It’s a practice.

The Second Pivot: Starting Over

Instead of forcing herself to stay in a business that no longer felt aligned, Kate started paying attention to what did energize her. She realized she loved being behind the scenes. She enjoyed systems, organization, and supporting other business owners without being the face of everything.

So, while pregnant with her second child and parenting a toddler, she launched her virtual assistant business.

It wasn’t glamorous. It wasn’t guaranteed. She even deleted her previous Instagram account and started from scratch. From a visibility standpoint, it looked like stepping backward.

But from an alignment standpoint, it was stepping forward.

Her VA business quickly filled through referrals. And as more women began asking how she built it, she created educational resources to help others do the same. What started as a pivot became a new chapter — one that felt lighter, more aligned, and more sustainable.

The most important part wasn’t the income. It was the feeling. She was building something that supported her life instead of competing with it.

Redefining Success as Peace

Perhaps the most impactful part of our conversation was Kate’s redefinition of success. Early in her entrepreneurial journey, success looked like growth. It looked like hitting milestones and earning titles. It looked like public validation.

Now, success looks like peace.

Peace in her finances. Peace in her calendar. Peace in her relationships. Peace in her nervous system.

This doesn’t mean ambition disappeared. It means ambition shifted. Instead of chasing arbitrary numbers, she began asking whether her work created the life she actually wanted to live.

In a culture that glorifies scaling at all costs, choosing peace can feel countercultural. But when peace becomes the metric, decision-making becomes clearer. You stop comparing yourself to strangers on the internet. You stop chasing growth for growth’s sake. You start building intentionally.

There is nothing wrong with big goals. But they have to belong to you — not to someone else’s algorithm.

The Reality of Social Media and Energy

Another layer of this conversation centered around social media. It’s both a powerful business tool and a source of exhaustion. There were seasons when showing up daily felt energizing for Kate. There were seasons when it felt draining.

As we recorded this episode, she was intentionally taking an entire month off Instagram. Not because her business depended on it failing. Not because it wasn’t useful. But because she needed space.

That choice reflects a deeper truth: you are allowed to step back. You are allowed to protect your energy. You are allowed to recalibrate your visibility.

Authenticity doesn’t mean constant access. And if showing up online starts to feel performative instead of aligned, that’s worth paying attention to.

Boundaries as a Form of Leadership

One of the most practical takeaways from Kate’s journey is how her client boundaries evolved over time. In the beginning, like many entrepreneurs, she said yes to almost everything. Every inquiry felt like opportunity. Every project felt urgent.

Over time, she realized that sustainable business requires clear boundaries. She established firm work hours. She stopped reopening her laptop after picking up her kids. She raised her prices to reflect her experience.

And the outcome wasn’t lost clients. It was better clients.

Boundaries signal clarity. They communicate confidence. And often, they attract people who respect the structure you’ve built.

For mothers in business, boundaries aren’t selfish. They’re stabilizing.

Permission to Change Your Mind

If there is one theme that runs through this entire conversation, it’s permission.

Permission to pivot.Permission to redefine success.Permission to change your mind.

As adults, we often hold ourselves to rigid expectations. We assume that choosing a path means committing to it indefinitely. But we encourage our children to explore, to try new things, to evolve. Why wouldn’t we extend that same grace to ourselves?

Changing your mind isn’t failure. It’s growth. It’s clarity. It’s refinement.

Motherhood accelerates that refinement process. It forces you to confront what matters and what doesn’t. It asks you to reassess old goals and decide whether they still fit.

And when they don’t, you’re allowed to adjust.

Honoring the Season You’re In

As Kate prepares for her oldest child to enter kindergarten, she can already sense another shift approaching. Different rhythms. Different availability. Different possibilities.

Instead of resisting that change, she’s asking what this new season makes possible.

That question feels like the heart of alignment. Not clinging to the past. Not fearing the future. But staying honest about the present.

Motherhood reshapes us. Business reshapes us. Experience reshapes us. The goal isn’t to build one static version of success and defend it forever. The goal is to evolve alongside your life.

If you’re in a season where something feels misaligned — whether it’s your work, your pace, your goals, or your visibility — you’re not behind. You’re not inconsistent. You’re not failing.

You’re growing.

And growth often begins with the simple, courageous act of asking: Does this still fit?

How to Connect with Kate

• Instagram: @yourbffkate

• Podcast: The Virtual Assistant School Podcast

• Website: https://yourbtsbff.com

the mama making podcast, motherhood podcast, mom entrepreneur, virtual assistant business, work from home mom, redefining success, alignment in business, pivoting in motherhood, flexible work for moms, online business boundaries